I guess one of the reasons i havent blogged in a time (i wonder if anyone besides tiffany ever read this xD) is because i have been sulking into another depressive episode, and even if i wanted to say something i guess it was the best for me not to post or i would have ended posting about how bad i feel or how i wish for things to be, hate when some friends come to me "talk to us we are friends" when the last i want is bring my irl issues to them and to my computer screen when i am online.
i was thinking about this this morning just after i wake up, you know when an idea strikes your mind so clear and jyou just say "oh uh.." is funny how something rushed by another depressive episode pushed me to desire the console and that did lead to win this xbox360.
See, i used to tell my friend alec "i wont bother to know about games of consoles i cant afford" and i used to say that not because i didnt wanted to get an xbox360 but because i didnt wanted to feel pressure and go down even more because i could not affod one and i wanted to get a console so much, so is why i told that to people like alec because well, you know if something is a source of depression just keep it away, for your own good.
but back to november-december 2008 i was extremely down, stopped drawing, php, and pretty much anything i was trying to work on months ago, and i think is when the thought of "i want play with my friends" striked me, wanted to go online and play with Alec on Final Fantasy 11, Gears of War 2 with Erick because i was having the thought not to just play a new fabulous ultra duper graphics game but having fun with friends to forget a bit the depression i was having.
Probably the desire was boosted for the amount of Halo 3 machinima i was watching back then, good or bad i dont know, but i think that pretty much resume why i started to desire to have the console that much unlike before.
And the most ironic is, that thought to go play online with friends was but a mirage, before i got the console alec, erick and others was asking me a lot "when are you getting one? :D" and now i do and none cares to ask why im not going live or if i want go live and play with them, it's funny, well i could go on with this topic but is enoguh boring and emo already, but yeah i really wanted to blog about this.
Hace 3 días